More Happy Halloween! I love these babies so much.
BFF: why do you like sharks if everything about them is terrible?
Olivia, 5: because I like bad things.
While watching 20/20 about heroin and the friend...
BFF: so how do you keep your kids safe and away from this?
Me: I think you should just start now, put them in pre-hab.
he *was* the best actor out of Madras.– BFF’s husband, on the subject of River Phoenix
more Max and football. and his dad.
WARNING: do not watch if you hate cute kids somehow, this boy who (unsuccessfully) tried to talk me into these shoes is a total jock with two super not jock parents.
I'm sorry for spamming Tumblr with all the kid...
I visit once a year and they are at such fun ages. just ignore me for the next few days and then it will be all GPOY and what I had for dinner as usual. thanks for indulging me.
He referred to Facebook as Footbook so that’s what it’s called now.
The only mistake you can make is giving up.– 5 year old niece, clearly not knowing most of my life story.
Me: do you know who Elvis is?
Me: he's the King of Rock n Roll
3: I thought that was the lion.
Me: no that's king of the jungle
Choice quotes from the 4 year old I'm babysitting...
“it would make me sad if you wouldn’t cuddle me.” Hands me a tissue, “will you help me make this into a little screwdriver to pick my nose?”
there comes a day when you stop waiting for your...
well, fuck, I guess this is it.
Accepting an invitation to an evening of sexual deviance is completely different...– Dear Coke Talk: On the right answer.
so basically, I'm a moron.
two nights ago I included an unnecessary and wrong apostrophe in a tweet. today I used the word “questional” which is not actually a word. no, I was not attempting cutesy toddler speak as is the fashion of some of those who post around here. I meant to type “questionable” but failed. I hang my head in shame. but then, I didn’t go to college and I barely graduated...